Growing Up

How the Heck are you?! I'm doing GREAT! Just Peachy! Are you buying this? I know I'm not.

Truth is, I've been a bit lost. Trying to figure out my niche in life. I don't just want to survive life, I want to live it! And, I've been doing a bit of pouting, ok a TON of pouting about my past. Gosh, I could dwell on my past for the rest of my life, but that wouldn't be living.

So here I am, trying to figure out what comes next.

I have always been goal oriented. I think BIG and Dream BIG! The problem is, if things don't work out when and how I want them to, I FREAK OUT! Why do I freak out?! Geez, I put so much energy into the idea and follow through of the goal, and when it doesn't happen, it's such a let down. Poor Me......

So, what do I do about it?

Well, I can stop complaining for starters. The thing is, my goals do come true, just not on my watch. They ultimately happen but in their own time. By some strange force, something is trying to teach me to stop being so Arrogant. And, I'm starting to listen.

I'm trying to learn to become more Humble. I'm not sure why, I just feel like it's something that is necessary for my development, for my evolution. So I did a bit of research....

It turns out Shin Buddhism, or the teachings of Shinran, teaches the practice of Humilty for further development. Now, I'm not an expert in Buddhism, but certain aspects of it just make sense to me. In fact, I like to take a bit of knowledge from all beliefs either Spritually or Religiously. We can all learn from each other!

Shin Buddhism teaches two stages of development:

1-The growing stage
2-The maturing stage

In a nutshell, the Growing Stage, is literally just growing up. In this stage, we are usually arrogant and don't acccept or acknowledge our boundaries.

In the Maturing Stage, we can admit our arrogance and recognize our bounderies so that we can develop into better beings. It also teaches us that act of humility. A good person learns to become a humble person.

I remember, just a few months ago, a facebook post that I made: "I literally don't know what I'm capable of, I don't know my limits or boundaries"....Or, something to that extent. In that moment, I was arrogant. I truly felt like I had no boundaries. That I could achieve anything! This is not entirelly true, I do have boundaries.

Firstly, I'm not Superwoman! I can't do everything by myself, I will crash and burn. Next, I CAN achieve whatever I put my mind to with one exception...I have to put my entire energy into the task. I can't divide it to other tasks at the same time. I can multi-task, I can't multi-achieve. In other words, regular tasks aren't an issue. Working towards BIG ideas, takes a bit of energy. I can only work towards one big thing at a time. Also, I'm a bit impatient.

Now that I know and acknowledge my boundaries, I can continue to grow. It doesn't mean that things will ever become "perfect", it just means that I'm ready for the next stage of my life.

I don't have all the answers, I only have my own answers. To figure out what you need in life, you need to look inwards. Listen to your heart, and your dreams!

Keep Growing!

<3 Sig.